What I always was
by Christina-Potter-09
Summary: Ron's thoughts about Harry and Hermione during the War and the days after... Please R&R.


_Ron's thoughts about Harry and Hermione during the war and the days after..._

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Harry was always the famous, the reach one, the Team's captain, the handsome one with the girly fan club, the Hero…

Hermione was always the smart one, the best student, the know-it-all, the beautiful girl –after the third year-, the Heroine…

I, Ron, was just the third person of the trio, the friend of Harry Potter, the one which was following the Hero and then Head Couple… I was nothing more than the "the friend of…" or "the younger brother of…".

I was in love with Hermione since the fourth year, but I never had the guts to tell her about my feelings, I dunno how but I always driving her mad with my behavior. We could fight for hours without stopping for take a breath, and then Harry would scream or just leave us and we would stop without finding solutions, that drove us to not talk to each other for months in sixth year and having problems in seventh.

I was close to her during the Horcux hunt, I wanted to protect her, to help her, but she was too worry helping or comforting Harry for notice…

I wanted to be with her, I tried talk to her several times, I think she knew about my feelings and she was trying avoid "private" chats with me for not having the duty to reject me…

I'm sure she had some feelings for me during the sixth year, I know she had, but my actions and words must pulled her away, I was snogging Lavender in front of her… I dunno why… I just did, and I'm sure that broke her heart, I was just trying avoid my feelings for her because she was always so stubborn… Lavender was cute, and funny –sometimes in a ridiculous way- but she was good girlfriend, but she wasn't Her… We had an affair in seventh year but then I released I couldn't be with Lav when I was in love with someone else…

Ginny tried to be around us, during our last year but Harry was trying keep distances from her, I wanted to hit him for hurting my sister but I knew he needed time, why he never kept distance from Hermione?

The seventh year was really tough, we were studding for our N.E.W.T.s, and were searching and destroying Horcuxes, Hermione and Dumbledore's portrait were the main help.

We finally found and destroyed all the Horcuxes, even Naginni, and it was time for the Final Battle. Great Aurors, Order Members, Healers and D.A.s fought really hard that night at Hogwarts. We lost many, I lost many, Charlie, Percy and Dad were the Weasleys which fell that night… I couldn't believe I lost them, it was crazy, Lucious Malgoy killed my father, I killed his son, Hermione fought and killed Dolohov, her close-to-be murderer in fifth year and torturer that night, and Harry beat Him, when the Battle was over, Hogwarts' grounds were full of bodies, bleeding people and pools of blood, I found my best friends.

Harry was laying close to His body, bleeding, almost dead, Hermione was closer to me, she was bleeding by a big cut across her stomach, I picked her up, she was trebling and murmuring Harry's name, then I released what was going on…

I couldn't be mad at them, they were close to die, Harry was in love with her and she was returning his feelings. I couldn't blame them, he had the guts, she had the time and feelings.

They woke up some days after and they both asked to see me, I sat on a chair between their beds and they looked at me with weak but true smiles. Harry spoke first, "Ron, Hermione and I are together," he had said with a brighter smile and my heart broke, I forced a smile and said my congratulations, Hermione hugged me and whispered "thank you for everything Ron,". I knew she meant it, I knew she loved me but as a friend, Harry was the one who stole her heart, who made her feel complete, God, if I could only don't be so weak…

A year and a half gone, we are 18 ½ and 19 years old now. Harry and Hermione have started their Auror training and I'm working in the Ministry, in my father's job, it's not the best work ever but I'm trying be a professional Quidditch player. Harry and I have something like a tradition of being in a pub in London while Hermione is spending some hours with her parents before they return in Hogsmeade, Harry and Hermione are living in a house they have rent close to the village, I'm living in an apartment close to the Ministry.

I have been dating Luna for awhile but it didn't work very well, I talked to Harry about it and said he was sorry for me and Lun, but I could see he was happy and nervous, I asked what is going on, and he just smiled and took a velvet box and an envelope and showed them to me, he opened the box and a beautiful and expensive for sure ring was inside, "I will ask 'Mione to marry me," he said, his voice trebling a bit. He then opened the envelope and said "I bought the house we are living in, I think she will be happy…" he said and I' forcing more smiles and toasts to him. He bought a house for her. I know he will make her happy, I know they'll be happy, I know she won't cry, I know she won't fight with him and then go somewhere and cry like she did or would with me. I now know she is everything for him.

The marriage is in a month, I'll be the Best Man, I know ironic… but I will and I have to be happy for them, Ginny is not talking to them anymore, I know she is hurting but she is rude enough of hurting them or brave enough for being out of this daily nightmare…

My brothers are all happy for the couple, the Daily Prophet has almost daily reports of the "marriagefield", Hermione is crazy about all the details but hers and my mother and friends from the training are helping her and Harry is there for keep her cool, he really has the power of keeping her calmed. I would only made some joke which would drove her mad.

I'm standing next to the groom, he is talking a bit but he can't say much, he looks so nervous even more before the tasks in fourth year, we are waiting a bit more, and then the march is starting, the bridesmaids are walking slowly and then She is coming next to her father, she is so beautiful in her wonderful white wedding dress, her usually busy hair are straiten in a cute pony tail. Some curls escaping and stroking her shoulders. She is smiling brightly, her father is handing her to Harry, he is lowering his head and giving her a kiss on her cheek, I want to beat him, to hit him but I can't, they are in love, and I'm their friend.

The reception is nice, I'm on a table close to the one of the couple, they are having the first dance and then they are having some words with everyone, they are coming close to me and hugging me together, I know they are happy I can see them. Hermione is hugging me and whispering "thank you for everything" like she did two years ago in the Hospital Wind.

They are having one more dance and I'm just watching them, I know they are made for each other, I know they will be happy, I can see it in their eyes, in their hugs and kisses and smiles and chuckles, I will soon be "uncle Won Won" as Hermione is threaten me. They will have their family their busy or messy haired children with cute emerald green or chocolate brown eyes, and I'll be there, close to them, I dunno if I'll have a family but for now I just need time to recover, they're happy but I dunno if I will be. I want to but without her… something always will be missing…

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_Thanks for reading, please review._


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